by Tom McBride

    THE 2012 PARENTS’ MINDSET ADVISORY:                                                              20 QUESTIONS TO BE PREPARED FOR WHEN YOUR BABY TURNS 18. 

1. What was “software” and what was soft about it?  

2. Why do some universities fund minor-league football and basketball teams now instead of regular student athlete programs?   

3. What were “websites” and why did people visit them?  

4. What are those small metallic disks I keep finding in the attic?  

5. Did you ever actually change a light bulb?  

6. Where did all those European countries get the dumb idea of having just one currency?  

7. Is it true that once upon a time you actually had to type instructions into smart phones?  

8. Wasn’t it pretty weird when you had to wear nerdy dark glasses in order to watch 3-D television?  

9. Have those old people with salt and pepper ponytails occupying Wall Street always been there? 

10. How did people learn to play the guitar before their fingers were computer programmed?  

11. Do you remember when you first felt virtual wet or cold on your computer screen?  

12. What do you mean, our house was “under water” the year I was born?            

 13. How did people remember the sketches on the backs of napkins without smart pens to plug into their e-pads?  

 14. When are we going to put solar siding on the house?  

15. Did you actually communicate on Facebook when you were my age?  

16. Don’t white males want to become president any more?  

17. What did people in Qatar do about the heat before they put up all those artificial clouds?  

18. How did folks find their stray pets before insertion of GPS microchips became a part of getting them neutered?  

19. Do you think I’ll live long enough to ride in a space elevator?  

20. If we stop burning coal do you think they will stop building that sea wall around New York City?  

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